White Claw has taken the beverage world by storm with its fizzy charm, millennial appeal, and viral slogan: “Ain’t no laws when you’re drinking Claws.” As hard seltzers continue to ride the wave of popularity, they’ve also become ripe for comedy. Whether you’re sipping a mango Claw on the beach or cracking one open after work, there’s something universally funny about this iconic drink—and today, we’re diving headfirst into that fizzy humor. In this collection of 46 original White Claw jokes, we promise no repetition, no explanations, and no dull moments—just pure, carbonated comedy. From puns to punchlines, let this be your ultimate laugh-on-the-rocks moment. Get ready to claw your way through the funniest seltzer-based content out there.
46 White Claw Jokes That’ll Leave You Bubbling With Laughter
1. Claw and Order
Why did the White Claw get arrested? It was caught fizz-handling stolen bubbles.
2. Claw Me Maybe
I texted my crush, “You up?” and she replied, “Only if you bring White Claws.”
3. Seltzer and the City
Carrie Bradshaw didn’t choose between Big or Aidan—she picked mango White Claw.
4. The Claw-abiding Citizen
He never jaywalks, always recycles, and only drinks White Claw—what a claw-abiding citizen.
5. Fizztastic Voyage
Hop in—we’re going on a fizztastic voyage to the land of unlimited lime Claws.
6. Claw-some Responsibility
With great power comes great responsibility—but with White Claw comes great weekend decisions.
7. Claw Me a River
She cried over her ex until someone handed her a White Claw—then she clawed a river.
8. Breaking Claw
Walter White started making hard seltzer, and they called it “Breaking Claw.”
9. White Claw and Disorder
There was a party, a flamingo float, and 72 White Claws. Absolute Claw and disorder.
10. Claws Before Bros
The girls weren’t fighting over a guy—they were fighting over the last raspberry White Claw.
11. Jurassic Clawk
In an alternate universe, dinosaurs drank spiked seltzers. They called it Jurassic Clawk.
12. Game of Claws
Winter is coming—and so are the 12-packs of White Claw.
13. Claw-culator
I tried counting how many Claws I drank. My math broke. I need a claw-culator.
14. Straight Outta Claw-ton
He reps hard, drinks harder, and always keeps a cooler full—straight outta Claw-ton.
15. The Great Gats-claw
A roaring party, endless glitter, and just one rule: only drink White Claw.
16. Claws Gone Wild
What happens when a bachelorette party finds a Claw discount? Claws gone wild.
17. The Real HouseClaws
The drama gets real when the White Claws run out.
18. Clawpocalypse Now
They said the world was ending. I said, “Grab the Claws and let’s ride it out.”
19. Clawculus 101
Day 1 of Clawculus: If Johnny has 4 mango Claws and gives away 2, he’s still tipsy.
20. Clawlo Ren
The dark side doesn’t serve beer—it’s all watermelon White Claw and mood lighting.
21. How I Met Your Clawther
Kids, this is the story of how I met your mother—with a cooler full of White Claws.
22. Clawsanova
He didn’t speak Italian or quote poetry—but he brought peach White Claw and stole hearts.
23. Claw’s Anatomy
Patient needs 12 oz of bubbly fruit water, stat! Welcome to Claw’s Anatomy.
24. Law and Clawder
We cracked the case—it was the roommate who stole the last Claw.
25. The Fresh Claw of Bel-Air
In West Bel-Air I was sippin’ away, on a pack of White Claws almost every day.
26. Fast and the Fizzrious
This summer, Dom’s racing for pink slips—and for the last lime Claw.
27. Fifty Shades of Claw
He opened the fridge, looked at her, and whispered, “Let’s make poor decisions.”
28. The Clawfather
You come to me, on the day of my seltzer shipment, and ask for Truly?
29. Clawnado
Sharks in the sky? That’s fine. Just protect the cooler.
30. The Big Clawbowski
The Dude abides. Especially when there’s passionfruit White Claw in the fridge.
31. Clawrence of Arabia
He wandered the desert for 40 days—then found an oasis… of Claws.
32. Clawzilla
When White Claws get too powerful, they don’t hiss—they fizz. Enter: Clawzilla.
33. Parks and RecLAWreation
The government cut our budget—so we replaced the water fountain with a Claw tap.
34. That’s So Clawven
He predicted the future—and it was full of pool parties and hard seltzers.
35. Clawfellas
You know you’re in too deep when your gang runs on lime and wild berry.
36. The Clawshank Redemption
Andy crawled through a tunnel of nonsense—just to sip cold, sweet, fizzy freedom.
37. Clawtastic Beasts
New mythical creature unlocked: half-human, half-seltzer, all vibes.
38. Clawmageddon
The meteor missed Earth, but the White Claw meteor shower? It hit every college party.
39. Cloudy With a Chance of Claws
Today’s forecast: 80% humidity, 100% chance of hard seltzer rain.
40. I, Clawbot
In the year 3050, robots gained sentience—and immediately cracked open a Claw.
41. The Bachelorette Clawcation
She didn’t find true love—but she did find 24 mango Claws and a Bluetooth speaker.
42. The Hills Have Claws
Atop the mountain, they found ancient carvings that read: “Bring more lime.”
43. Claw-lluminati Confirmed
Every triangle on your can? It’s not just design—it’s a secret bubbly brotherhood.
44. Planet of the Claws
The apes took over—and banned beer in favor of refreshing spiked seltzer.
45. Claw’tie and the Blowfish
I only wanna be with you… and a case of Black Cherry Claw.
46. Clawdrey Hepburn
She’s stylish, graceful, and never spills her Claw. Breakfast at Seltzer-y’s, anyone?
Conclusion
White Claw has proven it’s more than a trendy drink—it’s a cultural icon with fizzy flair and endless punchline potential. From movie puns to pop culture spins, these 46 original jokes celebrate the bubbly chaos, fashionable appeal, and absurd charm of the beloved hard seltzer. Whether you’re team Black Cherry or Mango till you die, there’s something undeniably refreshing about a good White Claw joke. So next time you crack open a can, toast to the joy of laughter—light, sparkling, and just weird enough to hit the spot. Cheers to staying claw-some!
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