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47 Hilarious Mormon Dad Jokes to Brighten Your Day

by Hazel

Mormon culture, like many faith communities, embraces joy, laughter, and wholesome humor. One of the most beloved comedic staples within Mormon families is the timeless “dad joke.” These gems are known for their puns, groan-worthy setups, and clean humor that leaves everyone chuckling—whether at the joke or at how bad it is. Mormon dad jokes are especially fun because they blend everyday experiences, church culture, family life, and a touch of gospel light-heartedness.

This article offers a delightful collection of 47 unique and original Mormon dad jokes, each formatted with a bold subtitle for your reading pleasure. Perfect for Sunday dinners, family home evenings, or just cheering up a ward member, these jokes are as harmless as they are hilarious. Get ready for an adventure in clean comedy that celebrates everything from green Jell-O to early-morning seminary!

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47 Hilarious Mormon Dad Jokes to Brighten Your Day

1. Scripture Power Surge

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What do you call it when your dad reads the scriptures with too much enthusiasm?
A power surge in the Book of Mormon!

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2. Celestial Smoothie

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Why did the Mormon dad bring a blender to church?
He heard it was fast Sunday and wanted a celestial smoothie afterward.

3. The Stake President’s Grill

Why did the stake president buy a new barbecue?
He wanted to raise the steaks for ward activities!

4. Missionary Discount

Why don’t missionaries pay for gym memberships?
Because every morning they’re already doing spiritual reps!

5. Elder’s Quorum Curling Team

Why did the Elder’s Quorum start a curling league?
Because they wanted to sweep souls and the competition!

6. Liahona GPS

Why did Dad throw out his GPS?
He said, “If the Liahona worked for Lehi, it’ll work for us on this road trip!”

7. Green Jell-O Coma

What happens when a Mormon dad eats too much green Jell-O?
He falls into a Relief Society coma!

8. Testimony WiFi

Why did the WiFi at church always work better during testimony meeting?
Because the signal was strong with all those spiritual connections!

9. Baptismal Jacuzzi

Why was Dad disappointed at the font?
He thought “baptismal font” meant hot tub of the Holy Ghost.

10. Temple Trip Snacks

Why did the dad pack trail mix for the temple?
Because he heard he was going on a sealing hike!

11. FHE Karaoke

What’s a Mormon dad’s favorite Family Home Evening activity?
Sacrament hymn karaoke night, obviously!

12. Relief Society Bake-Off

Why don’t Mormon dads ever win the Relief Society bake-off?
Because their cookies lack spiritual substance.

13. Scripture Marking Mishap

Why did Dad highlight every word in his scriptures?
He said, “Now the whole book is my favorite verse.”

14. Seminary Snooze Alarm

Why does Dad set three alarms for seminary?
To give the Spirit plenty of time to wake him up!

15. Zion’s Landscaping

Why did the bishop ask Dad to mow the lawn at the church?
Because he wanted to prepare the field for general conference revelations.

16. Magnify My Calling Spray

What’s the Mormon dad’s favorite cologne?
“Magnify My Calling”—smells like elbow grease and priesthood power.

17. CTR License Plate

Why did Dad get a license plate that said “CTR 4EVR”?
So everyone on the freeway could Choose The Right… lane!

18. Eternal Dating

What do you call a Mormon dad’s advice about dating?
“Eternally long talks with eternal consequences.”

19. Modest Is Hottest Thermostat

Why does Dad keep the thermostat at 68 degrees?
Because modest is hottest, and the AC agrees.

20. Prophet-Approved Popcorn

Why doesn’t Dad eat popcorn during conference anymore?
He said, “Too many kernels of truth. Choked last April.”

21. Testimony Burrito

Why did Dad bring a burrito to fast and testimony meeting?
Because he believes in spiritual food—but also breakfast.

22. Family History Spy

Why is Dad obsessed with family history?
He says, “If I find one more ancestor, I get a free celestial upgrade!”

23. Fast Sunday Shuffle

Why does Dad bring a Snickers to church on fast Sunday?
He says he’s only fasting from complaining—not chocolate.

24. Home Teaching Hijinks

Why did Dad show up with balloons and a magician for home teaching?
He wanted to teach the lesson and make it disappear!

25. The Peculiar People Parade

What’s Dad’s favorite holiday?
Pioneer Day, because he gets to be part of the “peculiar people parade.”

26. Spiritual Dad Jokes

Why are Mormon dad jokes so righteous?
Because even their puns have priesthood authority.

27. Conference Call Confusion

Why did Dad take his laptop to the pulpit?
He thought he was supposed to join the sacrament via Zoom.

28. Heavenly Wardrobe

Why did Dad iron his temple clothes for two hours?
He said, “If I’m dressing for eternity, I better press eternally.”

29. Tithing Ice Cream

Why did Dad make the kids give 10% of their ice cream to him?
It was a tithing lesson they’d never forget.

30. The Home Evening Heist

Why did the kids call Dad “the spiritual bandit”?
Because he always stole the lesson spotlight with a pun.

31. Eternal Companion Coupons

Why did Dad give Mom a coupon book for Valentine’s Day?
Because “eternal companionship” comes with perks like free dish duty.

32. Latter-day Lightsaber

Why did Dad bring a lightsaber to primary?
He said, “It’s the sword of the Spirit, just… with cooler sound effects.”

33. Mormon Monopoly

Why won’t anyone play Monopoly with Dad?
Because he keeps building temples instead of hotels.

34. Ward Potluck Protocol

Why did Dad bring seven casseroles to the ward potluck?
He said, “One for each day of Creation—and leftovers.”

35. PPI Pi

Why did Dad bake a pie before his priesthood interview?
Because he thought it was a PPIe meeting.

36. “Return With Honor” Reminder

Why does Dad shout “Return With Honor!” every time you leave the house?
Even if it’s just to get the mail, he believes in noble errands.

37. General Conference Bingo

Why does Dad get more excited about Conference than the Super Bowl?
Because he’s undefeated in General Conference Bingo.

38. Priesthood Pancakes

Why does Dad call Saturday morning breakfast “priesthood prep”?
Because pancakes build the foundation of faith.

39. Missionary Mode

Why does Dad keep the thermostat at 72 degrees year-round?
He says it’s “mission field standard.”

40. Celestial Crockpot

Why did Dad name the slow cooker “Celestial”?
Because it works on a higher level of patience and reward.

41. Holy Ghost Goosebumps

Why did Dad bring a sweater to sacrament meeting in July?
He said he gets chills when the Spirit speaks.

42. Reverence Ninja

Why does Dad walk like a ninja during church?
To avoid disrupting the Spirit—or the sleeping toddler.

43. Bishopric Buffet

Why did Dad pack three lunches for his church meetings?
Because when you’re in the bishopric, you feed both the sheep and yourself.

44. Sunday School Stand-Up

Why does Dad tell jokes during Sunday School?
He says it’s the only way to keep the “spiritual snacks” from being too dry.

45. Scripture Chase Champion

Why does Dad always win scripture chases?
Because he memorized the entire Topical Guide in ’89.

46. Sacrament Meeting Speedrun

Why does Dad sit on the front row every week?
He’s trying to complete the “sacrament meeting speedrun” challenge.

47. Home Centered Hilarity

Why did Dad call the living room “Zion”?
Because it’s the center of their home-based gospel learning—and puns.

Conclusion

Mormon dad jokes blend faith, family, and fun into a delightful tapestry of humor. These jokes are perfect for lightening the mood during long church meetings, creating laughs during family home evenings, or just sharing a moment of wholesome levity among friends. In a world that often takes itself too seriously, the charm of a Mormon dad joke lies in its gentle, goofy wisdom—reminding us that joy is a part of the gospel, too. Whether you’re a member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints or just a fan of clean comedy, we hope these 47 jokes brought a smile to your face and a chuckle to your spirit.

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